Some things aren’t meant to last forever.

It was about this same time, on a blustery winter day in 2021 that I drove from Ohio to Pennsylvania to interview for a psychotherapist position. It was less than 24 hours after awaking from anesthesia and I have zero doubt that I bombed the interview.

BUT. GOD.

The man took a chance on this country girl from Ohio and hired her despite her inabilities.

A few months later, I packed my car, along with Maggie Marie and drove off into a very unknown adventure.

May 2021 Maggie & I headed to PA

The past (almost 4) years have held so many ups and downs.

Professionally I have learned so many valuable lessons from the man who took a chance on me. I have grown from the depth of wisdom from co-workers who have become friends. I have been humbled with gratitude from the clients who shared their lives.

About a month ago God asked me to once again step out in faith. As a girl who HATES change, I told him no twice, but after the third ask, I knew I had to listen.

I have officially accepted a new job as a behavioral health advocate for those in recovery transitioning to the career force.

There have many many tears these past few weeks as “goodbyes” and “see you laters” were shared.

As I looked back on the office I called “home” for the past four years I thanked God for all He did in that little office. I entrust those days, those clients and the words that were shared, to Him.

Thank you to my co-workers for the goodbye luncheon today, for allowing me to put a period on the time that we shared.

I have learned that getting out of my comfort zone is harder than I can imagine. However, each and every time I have stepped out in faith, God has always done big things and I am expecting nothing less in this next step He is asking me to take.

Am I scared? 100%!

BUT. GOD.

Where He leads, He is there.

I covet your prayers as I begin the next chapter on March 3rd!

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What are you afraid of?

As a therapist I spend a lot of time talking to clients about their fears. We all have them. Usually one fear uncovers another fear which uncovers another fear which uncovers another fear. In fact, it usually takes approximately 5 times asking the question “and what is under that fear?” until we are able to get to the “root fear.”

Most of us are afraid of our fears and therefore neglect talking about it all together….which…is precisely what keeps us stuck.

A few years ago I read the book, “Do it scared” by Ruth Soukup. Here is the Amazon link if you want to check it out.

I’m guessing you don’t need me to explain the premise.

Do. It. Scared.

I continue to speak these words to myself.

I’m afraid to sign the loan for my house.

Do. It. Scared.

I’m afraid to leave my family.

Do. It. Scared.

I’m afraid to….

Almost anything I have accomplished in my life that has meaning and value, with the power of God, I have done…scared.

Why do we let fear stop us? I would argue, even paralyze us.

I have been reciting to myself a lot lately, “do it scared.”

My pastor used a phrase awhile ago, “on the other side of awkward is awesome.” ~Tim Walker

I would go one step further to say, “on the other side of scared is sanctification.” Which, I have found to be true for me. If you’re not on the sanctification road, perhaps you could say, “on the other side of scared is solace.” Overcoming our fears can often reduce our anxiety.

Today I chose to do it scared. I know and believe that doing what God has asked me to do scared will lead to my further sanctification.

What are you doing scared?

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The night I threw my dishwasher out the front door.

I post a lot about the benefits of living in a tiny house off grid…so how about some good ole country truth telling…

If you live anywhere east of the Mississippi, you may or may not have been VERY cold last week. Remember the post where I wrote that Maggie Marie and I were quite warm in THE121? If not, you can read it Here.

I still would tell you that for the most part, we stay warm.

UNLESS Antarctica invades the Eastern part of North America and the temperatures drop below zero…then I would tell you that I become like Ralphie from The Christmas Story…

What happens to the tiny house when temps drop well below zero?

Check out the story Here from 2023 when my house flooded.

That’s what happens.

The pipes freeze if I’m not diligent to protect the house.

And well. It happened again.

Saturday morning I woke up to no water. Zero. Water.

I spent the day trying to “do what I knew to do.”

And then, I could do no more.

So I phoned every single person I knew could help.

No one answered.

BUT. GOD.

He wanted me to wait. To breathe. To have a little conversation with Him (remember how He does that?!).

And then all of my friends from all over began to call. And come.

Within time, God warmed my pipes and my heart in my surrender. So I was able to rest.

Until I wasn’t.

THE121 has an on demand water heater. And I’m sure you know that means that the heater doesn’t turn on unless there is water running through it.

So you could imagine my internal questioning when I was using the bathroom at 9pm and the hot water heater turned on!

Yep, you guessed it!!! The “last” pipe unfroze and the next thing I knew I was walking through water.

My dishwasher died in the debacle of 2023, however I never got rid of it (full disclosure I have been using it as storage!). Since I never got rid of it, the water hose was still connected and well…spewing water into my house.

So at 9pm, I opened my front door and threw it out.

Picture taken next day. Just so I could remember that this actually did happen.

And that’s how the dishwasher landed in my front yard. Frozen pipes.

Tiny house living isn’t always glamorous. But then again, living life fully isn’t always glamorous either. I want to live life fully and passionately. God gave me THE121 to teach me and heal me. This story serves as a reminder of the beauty of community. Those who show up, those who pray and those who help.

I just might keep the dishwasher in my front yard as a reminder, at-least for a little while longer.

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Silence Interrupted

The snow crunches under my feet…the pines stand still with white dust covering their half there branches.

It’s quiet here in winter and perhaps that’s why winter might be my favorite. The stillness beckons me to rest.

Here at THE121, my bedroom is on the main floor (which by the way was a must for me with all those bathroom trips!) and resembles a cave tucked into the end of the tall ceilings under Maggie Marie’s room. I’ve been told by guests who have stayed in my absence that it’s the best sleep they have ever had.

And so, at night, I rest. I rest hard in the silence of the woods, in my cave bedroom, here in the winter.

Until the silence is interrupted.

Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep.

When the batteries that power THE121 run low, the inverter sends out loud beeps to notify me that my powers about to go out unless I do something about it.

Turn on the generator.

At 2am.

This is off grid living. Sometimes I have to give up things to get things.

We all do.

I give up convenience to save on money.

As the silence was interrupted at 2am, I had time to talk to the Lord. And what a picture He gave me.

Most of us live our lives doing our thing without much thought, until our lives are interrupted.

If you’ve been following you know that I’ve had several major surgeries that have quite literally interrupted my life. And yet…it has been in those interruptions that some of my deepest soul work has been done.

The Lord is doing a deep work in my heart and I am choosing today to be thankful for the interruptions which force me to the hard.

The sun sets on Teabbery Acres
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Winter in THE121…how cold is too cold???

I love all questions tiny house living. I love that people are genuinely inquisitive. I think it’s natural human tendency to ask questions about things we don’t understand or know.

One question I get, particularly this time of the year, is “how do you heat your tiny house” and “do you ever get too cold in there?”

Both are great questions!

So first…I heat my house with propane! The first year I would haul 40lb propane tanks to and from work, stop at the gas place, haul the tanks off the back of my truck, have the nice man fill them, reverse process, travel home, unload and hook back up… I’m tired even now just thinking about it!

Second year…I got smarter! Isn’t that the phrase after all…work smarter not harder….

Second year, I had a bigger tank dropped off and now I am never without heat! Plus I save my back, which my body thanks me for.

I also insulate around and under the skirt which also helps on these super windy cold days here in the wooded mountains.

Another way I stay warm at night…I have a heated mattress pad on my bed and a heated blanket thanks to a SUPER thoughtful friend! About 30 minutes before I get in bed, I turn on the heat and when I get into my bed it’s like a warm hug envelops me.

So…do I stay warm? Yes!

Plus, if you’ve been hanging around long enough…you may know and remember, I LOVE winter!

I’d honestly rather be cold any day before I’d be dripping in sweat. I’m a big fan of blankets, hoodies and super thick socks. And good news…so is my sweet girl.

So happy winter my friends.

We are tucked in tight and staying warm here at teabereyacres in THE121.

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It’s never what you expect.

I groggily awoke this morning in my cozy tiny house and slithered out of bed anticipating a quiet and slow morning here at THE121. I climbed the stairs to wake up Maggie Marie and wished her a Merry Christmas Eve! I checked her bed carefully as last night she had been vomiting. All ok.

She ate her breakfast while I prepared myself my 43 year old Christmas Eve traditional cinnamon toast breakfast. The house filled with the aroma of cinnamon and coffee brewing while Christmas songs played.

I sat down to spend time with the Lord, coffee and cinnamon toast in hand, when my phone began exploding with text messages and a phone call.

The Christmas box never arrived.

Yes the one with my presents from Ohio. I shrugged it off expecting it would arrive later in the week, it’s not what Christmas is about to me anyways.

Except they said it was delivered.

The UPS driver lies, I told myself.

Phone calls to corporate, no responsibility taken, I surrendered that it was probably stolen at the bottom of my long drive. We’ll file a claim later.

Back to my coffee and Bible.

Then I sat in the quiet of THE121 crocheting and enjoying the snow, when I felt a whisper from the Holy Spirit check the bag you threw in your truck last week.

Last week as I was pulling up my long drive, I saw a random garbage bag thrown into the woods on the side of my drive. I saw a target box in the bag and knew that must be the present from my sister. I threw it in the back seat of my truck as, well, a tiny house doesn’t have a lot of space to keep large boxes and went about life.

But as the Spirit whispered, I listened and opened the garbage bag. There was the box from Ohio!

I phoned Ohio and exclaimed the Christmas miracle!

The package wasn’t where I expected it to be. It wasn’t in the wrapping I expected it to be in, and so in my mind it must have gotten lost or stolen.

My mind immediately went back to the least unexpected package this season celebrates.

Jesus wasn’t delivered by an expected person. He wasn’t delivered in an expected way. He wasn’t even wrapped in an expected package. The shepherds were guided by a star to find Jesus. I expect they wouldn’t have found him any other way as he was delivered in a very unexpected place.

So I wonder. What are we missing because we expect them or it to be a certain way?

May our eyes be opened this Christmas season to see the unexpected.

Enjoy the staged photo of my Christmas Eve tradition!

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The Quiet of the Night

I just tucked Maggie Marie into bed (yes she has her own bed and yes I tuck her in and yes you may judge me now). I turned off the Christmas tree lights and blew out my pine scent candle. I lay down on my couch, turn on my outside lights and look out my bay window upwards towards the towering pins that line my driveway. As I look up, snowflakes the size of dimes and pennies fall from the night sky. With each snow flake that falls the ground becomes a vibrant glittering white.

I haven’t gone out much nowadays and so it’s as if the earth that the snow falls on is untouched and the snow pure. The only sound is my generator running, pouring juice into my house to get me through the night but even that purring is a comforting sound to me now.

There’s something about snow that stills us, at least for me. It causes me to stop and the wonder of watching it, has yet to get old. Snow constantly reminds me of Psalm 51:7

“Purify me from my sins, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.”
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So maybe I’m still in awe because the snow reminds me of what Christ did for me on the cross. He purified me and washed me whiter than snow. If you live anywhere where it snows, you know what that whiteness looks like.

And so I sit and I watch tonight. I watch each flake fall on teaberry acres with an awe and wonder that Jesus Christ, the King of Kings has washed me whiter than the snow.

A glimpse out my window
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Truth over lies

As the rain hits the metal roof of THE121 this morning, the Christmas tree lights twinkle against the backdrop of the woods and my pine candle burns reminding me it’s Christmas time, I am tempted to despair. You may be reading this and thinking that sounds dreamy and you’d be right. There have been many a day I have dreamed for this. Maggie Marie cuddles up next to me, my crochet hook waiting to work, and yet…

I am tempted to despair. I am tempted to believe the lie. The deceiver would tell me you’re never going to get better. The deceiver would tell me God is never going to use you again. The deceiver lies.

I was so privileged (yes I intentionally used that word because so many aren’t) to attend church yesterday morning. Our pastors have been preaching on Spiritual Warfare because well…the battle is real.

This quote from John Mark Comer hit me:

So today I believe the truth. My story isn’t over. So if I continue to struggle physically and if I don’t return to work and if the pain never ceases, God IS still good. God IS who He says He is. God CAN and WILL use me for HIS glory and HIS story.

The deceiver won’t win. This side of heaven we all have our struggles and our thorns in our flesh. But oh what a glorious day that will be when we see our Savior face to face.

It’s also a glorious day when we chose to believe the truth over the lies. So today that’s my stance, fix my focus in the hard and chose to believe the truth, He is for me, This is for my good.

If you’d like to listen to the gathering you can find it Here.

If you’re wondering about this Jesus I talk about and how to know him, click Here

The flesh is weak. The battle is real. God is greater and He can be trusted.

Got questions? Reach out, I would to have a conversation.

I’ve got loads of time nowadays. Time to pray and time to listen. Maggie Marie and I are on the couch, choosing to believe the truth over the lies. Well I’m choosing, she’s waiting for her next treat time…

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Christmas in a tiny house…

One of the first (and most) questions I get living in a tiny house is “How do you have a Christmas tree in a tiny house??” or “can you do Christmas in a tiny house??”

I love that the answer is a big YES!!!

Christmas in THE121 is one of my favorite times of the year, when the tree twinkles from my bay windows against the dark backdrop of the forest and the world seems to stand still.

Each year, I feel that Christmas always looks a little different here. Last year I wasn’t home as I was in and out of the hospital recovering from kidney surgery while this year I’m home 24/7 recovering from colorectal surgery. (I can only pray 2025 is surgery free!!)

So this year as I pulled my decorations from the shed and pulled open the boxes, I kind of laughed as it was a culmination of how the year has gone…

Um…those blasted mice!!!

I had cleaned my shed out earlier in the summer due to a complete mess the mice had made. Turns out I missed a section!!

Mice nest anyone??

As I fluffed out the branches (after a good shake outside) this nest appeared. Atleast they were warm!

Mice very much like dog food.

And there you have it. The home of the mice. They are evicted now that Christmas has come to THE121. What a laugh and picture of this past year. Pulling out all the things where unwanted residents live, giving them a good shake down (or clean out) and putting them back together again.

Christmas has begun!

So can I have a tree? 100% and I may be biased but I think she’s beautiful.

A few years ago my aunt made me this beautiful lace nativity set and it’s my favorite part of my tree for all it represents.

So while Christmas looks different this year, I’m sitting in the different and sitting with Jesus, adjusting my focus and waiting for Him.

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He was expected yet unexpecting

For hundreds of years authors had been writing about him.

He is coming.

He would not be what you think, yet He will be what you need.

He is coming.

Some thought He had arrived when He really hadn’t. So they knew. Well they knew that

He is coming.

And then he came.

Did they know?

Did they walk past the messenger?

Did they scurry past the shepherds? They were probably sleeping. (It was late after all)

Did they walk past him as he sat at his dad’s carpenter bench?

Did they journey with him to Passover when He was 12?

What did they say when they finally Knew?

I have so many questions.

Would I have been like the Pharisees or the disciples?

I would like to think I know the answer, but I don’t because this side of heaven I have been both.

Right now, I am learning to be His apprentice.

May this advent season our heart posture be that of having eyes open to see, hands to receive and a heart to believe.

Because while yes we anticipate his arrival in remembrance, the fact is, Jesus has already come. God sent His Son Jesus because there was no greater sacrifice. Jesus came to be the sacrifice for me and for you. The sacrifice that opens the way for a relationship with the Father.

There is no greater gift.

So while we wait in expectation May we not want and wish Him to come like we think he should but know that He came, just as he was suppose to come.

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